Occupation: Keeper of my home.

Just some thoughts I had.

2010-11-11T21:51:00.001-08:00

I didn’t evolve, I was Created. I’m not smart, I was given WISDOM. I don’t just have fun, I have JOY. I don’t have good times, I have Quality times. I don’t have good days, I have BLESSED days. I don’t have love, I have CHARITY. I don’t have self esteem; I esteem OTHERS better than myself. I don’t have sin I am damned for, I have SALVATION. I don’t have a house, I have a HOME. I don’t have friends; I have BROTHERS AND SISTERS IN CHRIST. I don’t always feel safe, but I have PEACE. I don’t have everything I want, but I have CONTENTMENT. I don't just have children; I have AN HERITAGE AND REWARD FROM THE LORD. I don’t have a lot of money, I have TREASURE in Heaven. All of things are possible because I have JESUS CHRIST!

Childhood memories.

2010-10-09T22:46:00.000-07:00

As I try to remember the carefree days of my own childhood I usually end up remembering little life moments. I remember about what age I was due to what was going on at the time, the details are fuzzy a lot of the time, others crystal clear. I remember what made me scared, happy, safe, excited or just content.

The other day I was reading someone else's blog post in reference to what memories matter to children. It was an intriguing thought that I feel is very helpful and wise to consider as we raise our own children.

In the world today so much focus is on money, good times, fun trips, entertainment. Yeah, that is a big focus and a vain one at that. "All is vanity..." (Ecclesiastes)

What I read was implying that children don't cherish the big trips to Disneyworld nearly as much as they cherish those seemingly simple little life moments that happen day to day, week to week, year after year. And as I looked back, I saw the obvious truth, this person was right!

I remember one morning my parents waking me up to tell me "HEY we are going to Schlitterbahn, water park today!" I remember them telling me that, but memories of the actual trip are vague. The actual rides were kinda fun I suppose, but in the end what I remember is that I only felt safe if mom or dad were next to me, that they woke me up in the morning happy to see me and excited to do something fun with me, the car ride etc. All the simple little stuff. All in all that day never really stood out in my mind and I cannot remember much of anything about it to be honest. You think a kid would be thrilled, a little mini vacation on the weekend to a fun filled water park but, no, that isn't what really matters to children.

The memories that are the very strongest in my mind are the ones that happened at home. I remember washing dishes with dad while mom was out. I remember, daddy dancing me around the house to polka music, him listening again and again as I pounded out nonsense on the organ and made up songs to sing to him, I remember mom waking me from my naps and make me a cheese sandwich then us watching Eyewitness news together. I remember dusting the furniture, cleaning the bathroom, and helping her hang out clothes. I remember grocery shopping as being a fun outing and eating supper together as grand wonderful and exciting, I'll never forget finishing my plate and proudly showing it off to them! I loved my parents and they loved me. They cherished me and I knew it. They included me in the daily chores and outings. I was rarely left elsewhere. I was their girl all the time!

Thanks to the wonderful memories made at home with my mom and dad I grew up with values, confidence, love, a good world view, a love for the Lord, wonderful memories of happy times, knowledge, wisdom and the ability to seek all of those things for myself and my family. I was taught how to live by "living" life with my parents and not just partying through it or stuck shut away in my room with my TV and my cell phone. I wasn't sat in front of video games on Saturdays but instead out mowing the lawn or vacuuming the top of the cabinets and I loved every minute of it. The companionship we had as a family getting a job done and doing it well was more wonderful than anything money can buy. I felt needed, appreciated, and a vital member to a functioning hardworking family. And at the end of a long hard Saturday of work we got to get cleaned up and eat a good home cooked meal or get treated to a dinner out. When I was old enough I could go out with friends in the car that I paid for myself with my own money and then on Sunday we attended church together.

See, I wasn't given everything on a silver platter. I was blessed with parents who I knew could and would give me nice things but at the same time knew that I had to work and work hard to earn my own way and when I was ready, I was given the freedom to make my own choices.

I didn't have a perfect childhood but I didn't know that. I just knew that I was needed, loved, cherished, and I was a part of my parents everyday lives. Life was not about partying, vacationing, or spending more than we had just for a cheap thrill like a cruise or something frivolous. Even our vacations were modest and oh so lovely for that reason.

You know what I remember most about vacations, the normal every day type parts of the trip. Dinners together with loved ones, and my mother holding and comforting me when I got sick during a trip, the car rides, or moments spend in the hotel room just getting ready to go somewhere, the conversations. Kids don't need fancy clothing, fancy trips, or expensive things to make them feel loved and needed. They need parents who are willing to have them around all the time, for every day things and for fun, for work and play, good day or bad the kids are there and they are a part of the family no matter how young they matter and they need to know it. They need to know it through and through, not just an hour a day, or two hours but every single hour of the day your kids are a part of you and a part of your life and they need to be there side by side with you as you work or play and they will watch you, oh will they watch you, and you will be their guiding light as to how to act, think, talk, walk, work and most importantly; worship.

So, what will you do with your kids today? What will you put first? What will I put first....I will put God first and my kids will be right there with me as I do it.

Dad's you are so important too, I know it is easy for Dad's to sometimes leave it to mom. The kids seem to always want mommy anyway right? But, that doesn't matter. They want daddy, they just don't always think they can ask for him. He is different, he is almost regal as he is the man and he isn't the naturally appointed, on call, nurturer.

Daddy, he seems a bit more out of reach at times to a young child. He has to make himself available in a big way. I think some of my fondest, most cherished memories are the ones of my dad. He didn't have to but, he stayed up late with me quite often telling me stories and comforting me when I was scared. To a young little girl a man like DADDY seems big and strong and able to protect her against anything in the world. And to the little boys Daddy is who he wants to be when he grows up, what will these little boys think it means to be a man? They will learn it from their Daddy. And even little men in training need to feel safe and protected by their dad.

But, only if he is willing, he has to be willing and make himself available even when she or he doesn't seem to need him, Dad's are precious and just as important to the life of the home as the mommies.

Going out of the house with kids.

2010-10-06T09:08:00.000-07:00

The other day I went to the store all by myself! That was strange, no car seats to buckle and unbuckle, not as many trips to the potty and I got done is less than two hours and made it back home. It was like the twilight zone for me.

I have learned it takes some planning to go out with kids, spontaneity is much more difficult a thing to come by once you have children. Actually it is really non-exisitent and most people who don't have children don't understand that and those who haven't had a toddler in the house for many years seem to forget what it can be like.

I will say this, it is easier now than it was with my first child all those years ago, as a newborn she screamed in the car...all the time. People would say "babies sleep in the car" and I would be like...on what planet? Car rides were kept to very short trips because the stress of it was too much to bear very much very often and I couldn't stand to make her cry just so I could go somewhere, she learned to like car rides by age one thankfully.

Well these days I am toting two partially potty trained toddlers. So, you can imagine the stuff I have to remember. Cups, wipes, pull-ups and diapers, extra clothes, tissues, car ride entertainment must be in the car like books or a toy, the girl has her things she wants with her now like her purse or backpack and jewelry or a doll for her to pretend care for while we are out. The list is endless for long trips and over night.....well, I don't do that. My kids are creatures of habit and we are pretty miserable in a bed other than our own.

I have learned there are a few things I have to have a lot of in order to go out with kids and make our errand running and visits to friends enjoyable and free of stress.

Rule #1- Be patient, very patient. There will be surprises and detours. Plan on the trip taking at least twice as long as it would if you went by yourself or only with adults. Plan on it taking you at least 30 minutes longer to get ready per child. So for me an extra hour or so is taken to get ready. You never know when someone may dirty themselves and you have to get them ready all over again.

Rule #2- Come prepared, if you don't feel like carrying it too bad, at least leave it in the car. You never know how much that towel or blanket, whatever may come in handy when you least expect it. Take twice as much of everything you think you actually need. It doesn't always come down to needing it but when you do, trust me you will be grateful you "over" packed the diaper bag.

Rule #3- Relax, I know sometimes easier said that done but when we are out we will often take a group "time out" to regroup and calm down. Maybe one kid was throwing a fit in the store and we were getting stares, or maybe we just had a poopy accident that took a long time to clean up and now we are all feeling a little tired and stressed, whatever the reason for the stress quickly find a place to just be still for a minute or two. The kids get used to this and sometimes I take a personal time out in the car before heading in the next store. The kids are listening to their music or maybe they fell asleep in the car because we have been out a long time. It is usually that I start rushing thinking I need to get it all done fast and I start to feel out of breath, worn, and not enjoying myself at all. So, I just sit there and close my eyes and breath deep breaths until I feel better. For longer trips this may consist of having to stop at a rest stop and have a snack, taking about a 15-30 minute break. It is worth the time. Then we are ready to move on to the next errand. which brings me to...

Rule #4- Don't rush, we get done when we get done. The house and the work in it will be there when we get back. We have many days of all day at home, let's just enjoy our outing shall we?

Rule #5- Smile! I like to try to smile at people and enjoy my children and not get flustered if they get in someones way in the store. I just smile and say how are you so sorry about that, how are you today? This usually gives the otherwise annoyed person a chance to stop and see, "She is doing her best, the kids didn't mean to get in my way, oh, they are cute aren't they?" How many times have you had someone look downright angry at your children because they didn't move out of the way fast enough? Yeah, it happens, just take it for what it is and smile. Some people don't have kids or they are just having a really bad day. You never know, I've had my fair share.

Rule #6- This rule helps make all the others happen. Plan ahead, even for the small trips. Even for the unexpected trips! How to plan for the unexpected? Be prepared with a full diaper bag and keep your house well. I find that when I am doing my keeping of the home well I am a lot better prepared for the unexpected. Making sure you have money around, food around, clean clothing, plenty of kid medicines, clean house as best you can, packed "emergency" bag, toys already in the car for bye bye, and the house organized enough I can find my keys, wallet, clothes, and everything quickly without having to search for it. All of the things we do while we are at home can help make it easier to deal with an unexpected outing or unexpected anything for that matter.

Rule #7- Have fun! Even running errands can be a great chance to enjoy your kids. Laugh with them, point out cool things to them, get them a balloon at the store, make the ride in the shopping cart extra fun with start and stop games, even teaching can happen as they see all kinds of new things. I have actually had a woman who crossed our path twice in the same store stop to tell me with a grin on her face "Yall are just having too much fun!" I just said, "yes we are!"

So, I hope that you found something useful or at least enjoyed my little rules for outings. I do love going out with my children. It is kinda strange to not have them in the grocery store with me. Feels big and lonely and it is so great to see them have fun just riding around or helping me push the cart. Sure it takes an hour longer but it is worth it. Though it is still ok to leave them home with daddy now and again.

Learning to deal with a hectic day.

2010-09-29T16:24:00.000-07:00

Well, today was a great day. I had a very calm, relaxing day of housework. The children didn't fight, they didn't get any boo boos, I got a ton of my work done at a good calm pace and even got in a workout, a shower and a nice chat on the phone with my mother. I have plenty of time left this evening to wind down and enjoy my wonderful family over a home cooked meal.

But, not all days are this perfect. I have had days where it seems I am stubbing my toe all day, spilling everything, the phone is ringing off the hook, the kids are crying, fighting, one has an owie, the other spilled his juice, husband isn't happy, the cat is hungry, the supper is burning....AHHHHH!

Yeah, those days....I get stressed, I try to rush and get it all done. But, it isn't worth it. When I do that I go about with my stomach tied in knots, my nerves are shot, and I have a knot in my chest all day. Mama isn't happy, kids aren't happy, daddy isn't happy then we are just relieved when bedtime gets here and I wonder where the day went.

I am learning though, learning to just relax, take a deep breath and do one thing at a time because you never know. Maybe tomorrow may very well be one of those great calm days and I can catch up. The work will still be there in the morning. On a hectic day I just need to chill, let the house stay a bit dirty...what's that honey? Your favorite shirt is dirty? Well, can you please where this one until tomorrow, I will do it tomorrow I promise. Let's just be thankful for where we are right now even though things are not going perfect, even though we don't know what to eat for dinner right now and it is already six o'clock in the evening, even though mama didn't' get any sleep last night, even though the kids are fighting....lets just all sit on the floor and play. Let's take care of our mood and attitude and our childrens needs, worry about all the rest later.

I would rather have a happy day in a messy house as opposed to a horrible day in a clean one. :)

Loving our children and serving them.

2010-09-21T21:14:00.000-07:00

I have a confession to make and I'm really opening up by doing so, when I was a young lady in my teens, the thought of having children did not appeal to me. Sure I liked babies and holding other peoples babies could be fun. But at the time the thought of raising my own didn't sound like something I wanted.

Years into our marriage I thought having one might be nice, but one was all I desired at the time. I never really wanted to have anymore. I was happy with the one we had, but God had other plans and gave us another sooner than we expected he would. Turns out that was all part of his plan, he knew we would lose our precious first child....she was my sidekick and I long for her every day....

After that I still didn't want anymore, probably even less, I wanted to enjoy the one we had left. I wanted to pour all my energies into raising her and loving her just like I did with my first, living each day to the fullest with her because I knew how precious time was and how short life can be.....

But again, God gave me yet another child, a son this time and he is SUCH a huge joy to me now. So I have two AWESOME kids left to raise on this earth.

For someone who never really was a "kid person" I sure do loving being with my children. It is different when they are your own. And yeah sure, it can be very hard, even grueling at times to raise children. The job certainly comes with long hours and no vacation time whatsoever. Being a mother has taught me so much about love, so much more than I could have learned anywhere else.

I won't dare make excuses for not spending enough time with my kids. This was a job given to me by God and it is a job given to dad's too, they don't get out of this deal either. The kids were a gift to us and we do well to give of ourselves to them and I have tried my best to do so from day one. Sure sometimes I feel like just throwing my hands in the air and just send them to Oma's (German for grandma) house for half a day...but she already had to raise me now, LOL I'll just let her enjoy her empty nest and coming to visit the grand kids!

I feel guilty when I don't feel like reading "another story Mommy!" or when I cringe at the words "come color with me" because I am busy. Yeah, I do sometimes not want to but it isn't about me wanting to, it isn't always about me just really wanting to do that stuff, it is about loving my children and being there for them because that is my job as a parent. I love them, if I didn't I wouldn't feel guilty about sometimes not feeling like doing this or that, but I do love them so so much. And you know what, I quickly learned to really love to color with my kids, and read them another story, and play silly games etc. They deserve my time and my all; and the JOY they give back to me in return is priceless. My silly hobbies, house cleaning, and whatnot can wait until story time is over, my kids need me and I love to serve them. :)

Making a house a home.

2010-09-09T00:22:00.000-07:00

Today I had a great day, I got a lot of work done and the kids played well together for the most part. That is always a great day. Had a little alone time with my dear husband in the evening, good supper, and a fresh start to look forward to tomorrow God willing.

I don't think I will ever tire of the simple things in life, things like what I just described. The children are a joy, the husband is the love of my life, and the house is a thing in this world put in my care. But, at the same time, it is so much more than just a house. Sure, it keeps us warm and safe during a storm, cool and comfortable during the heat of summer. But, there is so much more to a home than that.

As a keeper of my home I see the value in making the comfort extra special. I may not have perfected it yet but I had a good start as I wrote about in my first post here, what my mother taught me.

I think she really taught me much more than she knows. Maybe I didn't see the wisdom in it all until just recently but the way she ran the house certainly had it's impact. Let's not forget my dad in this, his leadership, his prayers at supper, his guidance in all things spiritual and good, his ever seeing eye of what was right and wrong with his children was such a huge part of all of it. To me as a daughter I see how great his role was in my life but this post is about how I learned to live out my role, as a woman. So, we'll save that daddy daughter stuff for another day.

I remember some of the toughest times of my life were in public school. I would literally think, it doesn't matter because at the end of the day I get to go home! (And thankfully home is where I stayed once my folks started homeschooling me!)

I looked forward to being at home, it was my sanctuary. It was a place of peace and acceptance, love and nurturing, comfort and safety. No bullying, NO YELLING, NO FIGHTING, NO BASHING OR UNFAIR EXPECTATIONS. Home was safe, it was a place where we were all gathered together as one family and mom and dad were the center of that.

Sometimes I wonder the importance of things like cleaning seeing as kids tend to remember the fun stuff but you know what? The fun stuff....it can be cleaning! Isn't it grand!? That a daily chore can be so much to a child. Well, it can and it is. It was for me at least. I know we all have our own childhoods to look back and learn from. But for me, cleaning with my mom and the sanity her discipline, diligence, and peaceful way of just going about getting it all done gave to me was so important in how I live my life today.

She never seemed to grow tired of doing what she had to do to keep everything clean for us. She had such diligence, never letting selfish desires keep her from her duty...she didn't eat the bread of idleness. She was a strong woman who worked swiftly and with purpose. Was it always the proper purpose, honestly I don't know. I was just a kid. But I know what the proper purpose is now. To do everything "heartily as unto the Lord".

And yes, a clean house can matter. The kids may not ever know what you do or how you did it, even if that is the case, it matters to their world. The comforts and home you create not just by cleaning but by doing all of it WITH JOY and with them...it will matter to them.

It isn't just in the cleaning, but in the attitude. The attitude of servitude to our family, love, honor and respect to even the smallest child. The desire to create a clean place of comfort, joy, happiness and good times for our kids to come home to or stay home with no matter if they are public schooled, moved out, or home schooled...it is our job to put meaning into the saying "HOME IS BEST".

For me, home was best and still is. Home was best not just because it was clean, well kept, dad kept up with repairs and mom made great meals...though that did help to show how they cared through actions...but it was in the fact that I always felt how much they loved having me around. Their smiles, their asking me to help them, by their way of showing that I didn't just need them but that they too needed me. They never hid their emotions, their love of the Lord or the fact that they expected us to work hard too. We knew, we knew we were loved, cared for, and that we weren't expected to be perfect...just as our Father in heaven loved us it seemed my parents here on earth did their best to love us the same and still do even though we moved out. Thank God for such wonderful parents, I pray I can be half the parent they were.

Salvation thoughts of mine I had one night.

2010-09-08T22:48:00.001-07:00

I let the Lord lead this writing, I hope it benefits someone. You can view it here:

http://www.facebook.com/notes/to-walk-the-christian-walk/salvation-thoughts-i-just-let-the-words-flow-hope-it-helps-someone-somewhere/146421658721659

Making dinner TIME.

2010-08-25T22:53:00.000-07:00

It can be hard to get us all at the table at the same time to eat dinner. I don't know if it is just a guy thing or something but, it seems, men tend to wander to where their hobby is sitting. I have this grand desire and idea of perfect family meals all of us seated joyfully together around a feast every night...Ok, maybe not a feast but some type of life sustaining substance......

I believe wholeheartedly it is best for any family to always eat together and pray together before and even after a meal. But, that of course doesn't always happen when you are raising two toddlers. I seem to remember meal time being much simpler pre baby....yes, it is coming back to me...then, the first time I had to nurse at the dinner table...

I would sometimes wonder why my husband felt the need to eat at the desk or why I would even feel the need to eat somewhere other that the kitchen table. But, as with all things I figure practice makes perfect and there must be something I am doing or not doing that could make this idea of mine, family dinners every night, possible. I'm still practicing myself so bear with me.

First: I must have a willingness. If I don't realize and accept the importance of us all eating together at the table, even if a lot of the meal is spent convincing the toddlers to eat, it won't happen! I have to put this as a priority, I after all....am the one who cooks the food!

Second: giving up some freedom to prepare and plan. As a mother it can sometimes be hard to give up even more so called freedoms but, putting my husband and children first is always something that will need even more improvement in my heart, I am sure. I have to plan plan plan to make sure that mealtime is family time. That planning is up to me.

Third: If I make it they will come! I have noticed a trend in my house. If I serve "buffet style" dinners where I make the kids plates and DH his and me mine we may all end up eating in different areas. Meals served from the stove end up being eaten in separate rooms.

Maybe the 3 year old wants the floor, the younger usually the table...he pretty much goes where the food is....ah. The man ends up at the desk. I just eat whenever where ever, feed kids first, I eat when they are done.

I am remembering something "the way to a man's heart is through his stomach"...ah yes...Ok, so I am teasing a little but seriously though. I love my husband and I love to be with him especially at dinner time, I HATE eating alone even though I have two toddler mouths to feed I want him there feeding our offspring of love with me. So, I have noted that if I serve at the table; if I lay all of dinner out with place settings (fancy words meaning plates with forks....whoops I forgot the knives!) we tend to all end up sitting there together! EUREKA! Walla! Family meal time. Seems easy enough.

Make it in your mind, cook it on the stove, place it all at the table and ring the dinner bell. Everyone to the TABLE for mealtime! No kids, sorry, no snacking beforehand, dinner is ready when it is ready. We eat TOGETHER! Let us pray and give thanks. Success. A happy family meal. (note to self, be sure to let DH know what time supper is....yes, that is key)

It is up to me. I keep my home, I make the meals, I make the family meal time happen. Praise the Lord for opening my eyes to what makes it happen for us in our own little situation. :)

So I am making a new habit, I am helping my whole family make a new every day habit. I am making it easy for them to always end up eating together, easier on me too (yes it is still hard sometimes). I am making sure that the food is there for everyone at the same time every night, kids plates filled before we sit down, daddy called in several minutes before it is actually time for him to sit (this way he can't be late and I can't get mad about it, he can be early even and I will then be thrilled). Kids have something to do to keep them busy while they wait for the food. It is good for them, they love it, I love it, it is one of the ways I keep my home.

I just have to plan it, fix it, cook it, lay it out.....I made it and they came. We ate together and that makes me a happy home maker. :)

Hint for the guys out there: if you want to please your wife, never be late to the table, better yet be early. ;)

QUALITY time.

2010-08-22T21:13:00.000-07:00

Today was a great day. I didn't worry about dishes, or laundry. Sure I think I did a load of one of those but, cleaning was not a big part of my day today. Usually it is, but not today. Today I spent a lot of quiet time, time alone and time with my kids. All three of us got a nap! That is awesome.

My day started wonderfully with my two littles sitting smack dab on top of me laughing at how funny they thought it was to wake mommy up like that.

We proceeded with the normal daily tasks of changing clothes, washing up, eating...the basics of life right. And then the whole day was just so quiet, that is so unusual with toddlers! I mean, I suppose for some it would have been considered loud but for me, who usually spends a rather crazy day getting everything done with two toddlers, things can get much louder than this. It was so peaceful and so needed.

We had some nice quality time and I really enjoyed watching them play so nicely today. Not many boo boo's or fights over toys, it was just so sweet.

All day long I got tickle requests, that is so funny. I HATE being tickled, I don't see why they like it so much. LOL

Larissa spent the morning dressing up, she insisted I get her something fancy out of the closet to go with her red tights. She looked ready for winter despite the 100+ degree weather we have been having. It was sweet though and she enjoyed it.

Gavin did some adorable things like taking his matchbox car and running it over a picture of a car that he insisted I let him hold (I was hesitant as it is a picture on one of Larissa's flash cards for learning her letters), but I let him hold it as he was just so thrilled with it. "CAR VROOM VROOM" those were his words.

Ah, I know, such simple little things but to me as a mom they all mean so, so much. To be here to take the time to just BE with them and enjoy our simple life here at home is such a huge blessing. They are great kids and I know I am in the right place here at home with them. Thank you Lord for such a great blessing!

To be able to sit on the couch visiting with my parents all the while my kids are learning about how to communicate, learning their letters and names of things with our flash cards, and just all of us enjoying being together. That is such a huge blessing.

So many great moments today I can't even think of them all right now. All I know is that at the end of today, all is right with the world. Goodnight all!

Dirty Jobs, somebody has to do it...

2010-08-21T21:10:00.000-07:00

...and usually that means mommy! Course, mommies end up having to do a lot of diaper changing and cleaning up potty training messes, scrubbing toilets and showers. Clean up the mess from the old food forgotten in the back of the fridge, mold and all; hey it happens sometimes.

I think that as a youngster I really took it for granted all the gross messes I didn't have to deal with. Today I had to clean out the outdoor diaper pail....and I just about threw up. With the heat it has such a stench that I held my breath as much as I could without passing out! Every now and again it needs a good scrubbing to keep it smelling acceptable. I mean, it is diapers so I don't expect roses but I expect to not smell it when I simply walk by.

All this to say, thanks mom for all the years of cleaning our nasty messes! Cleaning the toilets for us, wiping us during the diapering years and I will never forget how thankful I was you never asked me to dig the hair out of the shower drain! I also remember a time of throwing up on your shoulder, yeah, I'm sure you loved that, LOL

Thank you thank you thank you! And thank you for all the messes you still clean for me when you come to visit. You are the BEST!

So, be sure you go thank you mom for all she has done. And not just on mother's day! Do something nice for mom, hey, clean a mess for her even if you don't live there anymore!

Things I am thankful for.

2010-08-19T22:14:00.000-07:00

I try to be a thankful homemaker but sometimes I fail miserably. I failed at one point today and I regret it so. So, in the spirit of being thankful and counting my blessings "name them one by one" I am going to list some things that I am thankful for as a keeper of my home.

1. Salvation, I cannot start a thankful list without mentioning the fact that we know where we are going when we die thanks to the sacrifice of our Lord Jesus Christ!

2. My husband, I am thankful for him: to say that isn't enough, I am thankful for his faults and his strengths. His faults as they cause me to work harder on my own faults and his strengths and they make me stronger. I am grateful he is working hard at a job he wouldn't have necessarily have chosen if he didn't have a family to care for. I am grateful he loves me and he loves the kids, that he sees his own faults and tries to work on them, that he loves the Lord. I am grateful every time he does some dishes to help me out and that he doesn't require I press his work clothing, that he sees how busy I am and tries his best to take it easy on me and lessen my workload. I love him and no words can really describe how much and how grateful I am for this man that I know has even more greatness in him than he even knows.

3. My kids, I am so thankful I have two here on earth with me and I am so, so thankful for the two precious years I had alone with our first who is now living with our Lord, I am grateful that she will never know the pain I knew as a mother having to say goodbye to her firstborn, that she is at peace where she is. I will see you at the great reunion my sweet angel!

I am also so very thankful for Larissa and Gavin, they have brought me such joy and are so very rambunctious that they keep me on my toes reminding how life keeps on going even when someone has to leave it. I am so grateful for the patience they require of me and the discipline I have learned in caring for them. (And am still learning!). I am so grateful for their health and that they are such happy little children who love me so, they have learned so much so fast and even when mommy feels sad they know just what to do. I am so thankful for that. A 3 year old and a 21 month old who know when I am not as happy as usual and they have this power and ability even now to make me feel better. How great is that?

4. The basics! They really aren't so basic, they sure wouldn't seem that way if they were gone. I am talking about our house, the land, the water, AC, one good car, furniture, clothing, food. We have it all! Even a computer and high speed internet. WOWIE!

5. I am grateful for my extended family (whether they are really a blood relative or not!), they have blessed me in such ways that I cannot even begin to describe. A moment here a moment there, a bit of learning, loving, understanding, a hug, a letter a thank you and your welcome from those that don't even have to give it. What a blessing!

Okay, I could go on all night but there is one more thing I have to mention before I call it quits and head to bed....The bible.

I am so so grateful that I have God's words right here on my bookshelf. I don't just have one bible I have THREE! I even have a toddler version for my kids. What a blessing! I have them right out here in the open and not a soul can punish me for it. We still have some freedom of religion left. What if that right were taken from us? Do you read the bible every day? If you couldn't....wouldn't you wish you had memorized more? We all would. I'm not pointing fingers, maybe to my own self but gosh. Sometimes I just take it for granted that I can openly read and talk about God's word. This is my right my freedom and it is such a huge blessing to have. My bible, Oh, did I say three, I meant four, there is a free one on the internet right here: http://quod.lib.umich.edu/k/kjv/

How great a blessing is that?

And of course, I am grateful for all of those who choose to read this. Thank you.

Life is good.

2010-08-17T23:53:00.000-07:00

I am BLESSED! I feel blessed, I always know I am blessed but every now and again I have a day that just really makes me feel so blessed, so joyful. My cup just runs over with it!

I love that feeling, that feeling of being so happy, feeling that all is well and being totally contented with what I have. There is nothing like it.

To sit and just have a blast playing silly little games with the kids and not have a care in the world, that is the next best thing to being a kid! To go through my laundry with joy just really feeling (more than usual) how awesome it is to care for a family, to just have a family. To be needed and wanted in this world and know where you will be when it is gone.

When your child comes up to you with a problem, a hug, to say I love you Mommy!, or in need of some comfort...or when you have to clean the kitchen after a good hearty meal you prepared for your family to enjoy....when you are seated around the table enjoying each other's company or just trying to convince a stubborn toddler to eat her food..... It is there. Joy is in the simplest of places if you only take the time to look.

God can bless you with joy in any situation. It helps if we ask, if we look for it, if we try to cultivate it and nurture it. Come to a bad situation with an outlook of joy and confidence. After all, we can do ALL things through CHRIST! Hooray!

God's way of teaching me patience...

2010-08-16T11:17:00.000-07:00

Housework seems to be a big topic for me. I grew up with no younger siblings, had my own room that I kept very neat and orderly. My mother was a tornado of dusting rags and mops never leaving anything unclean. She is a real cleaning whiz. My dad grew up with 8 siblings and their rule was you take it out you put it right back, he has always kept his spaces fairly neat. I really loved the satisfaction that came from a clean room, a cleared table, sparkling floors! Yes, I used to shine my floors before I had children. Oh the thought of a perfectly clean house to sit down and enjoy a good novel is like a beautiful dream I don't want to wake from. A fresh, lovely oasis for the queen of her castle.....a place for everything and every, dust free, thing in it's place.....

Oh ok, so I still love that feeling of just having organized something or making a room look like it jumped right off the pages of a Better Homes and Garden's magazine page....

But, the messy reality of kids and a husband, 3 home cooked meals a day, 4 baths, water on the floor, and ketchup stained shirts is a different dream altogether and for this recovering neat freak, a rude awakening to my own lack of patience.

I often fight the urge to just grab some jumbo size black trash bags, load em up with everything that got left on the floor and everything that doesn't have a place in my kitchen, (which is rather lacking in storage space), and throw most of our belongings out the back door and out of my life. I have a split second thought of, if it is on the floor the owner of said item must not care about it too much, let's get it out, purge, clean, visual calm and neatness is what I crave!.....then I calm down.

I remember how much we paid for my dear husbands good work socks and how much his feet hurt after a long hard day working the prison and I calmly pick them up and take them to the laundry room. I remember just how much my little Gavin loves his buzz lightyear and that is why he takes it out every single day to play with it.....and how expensive that was and how happy I was to buy it for him in the first place. I remember that Larissa just loves to play dress up just as I did and that my nightgown is one of her favorite "party dresses". I try and try to remember just how silly it is to need things to be perfectly in their place all the time. It isn't a reality, not for this mama and probably not for most.

I remind myself that my house isn't here for others to stand in awe of how beautiful my house is, or how great of a housekeeper I am, this house is for living in, for loving and playing. This house is a house I keep for my family. I remember that things can and do get cleaned and picked up, but they don't have to stay that way all day long. What oh what would I do sitting here with two toddlers in the middle of a spotless house? I know! Make a MESS!!!

All this to say that God is using this mess, these toys, dirty dishes, and piles of laundry to teach me to work hard, be patient, and force me to focus on what is important: my family. And this keeps me from thinking too highly of myself and my ability to take a house void of mess makers and turn it into that dream of me sitting all alone calmly reading a book uninterrupted in my castle of sparkling freshly shined floors.... Sounds lonely.

Messy moments in time. Too precious.

2010-08-16T00:07:00.000-07:00

As I look at old pictures it becomes increasingly clear how precious each moment with our family truly is. I look at the faces and smiles on my loved ones faces in a photo only to remember joy and happiness of that moment, to think how cute the kids look, how much fun we had that day or what my husband was doing that day.

Looking at old photos, just simple snapshots can bring a little perspective to what is really important in life.

I notice the toys strewn about the floor in the background, a purse not where it should be, a shoe out of place, a diaper bag half unpacked by curious little hands....and I see...that is life.

Life is living, life is going always going. Messes are made daily many, many times a day. As the toddler splashes sudsy water all over the floor a wonderful thing is happening, bonding, and some memories are being made, the child is learning, life is going on and all is well. The house doesn't look perfect, but is that what will matter, does it really matter that much right now? Is that what we remember later as we reflect on the past several years? How clean was my house one year ago? No, of course not!

As I look back at seemingly perfect memories, the house wasn't always perfect. Sure, it was clean enough (never tolerate total filth, that is absurd but), but always tidy, no. Of course things were out of place quite often in a home that houses a toddler or two. Toddlers like to take things out and explore what happens when they throw all the blocks over the whole room. They want to wade through and in everything that we will let them.

So, let's let them. Let's lighten up a little and let the kids make a mess now and again. Life can get messy. There will be a day when they are all grown up and my house will be spotless (as my mother's is now) and the kid's will have their own kids and they will have to pick up toys ten times a day. But for now, the mess is ours to enjoy with our little ones, so let's climb under a sheet tent and take all the books off the shelf and read every single one all in a row! What a memory! Someone get the camera, we need a picture of this mess! :D

Always learning.

2010-08-12T10:56:00.000-07:00

Two little twin kittens are in my care today. We have had many a wild mama cat abandoning her young around here lately. My husband tried to save two that didn't make it, then a few days later we found four more, two went missing over night now we have two left. So, he started up bottle feeding kitten replacement formula to them and they seem to be thriving.

I had been thinking of getting the kids a pet that they could call their own but they are yet way to young to take care of one themselves. Seems the Lord has dropped two pets in our laps when we weren't expecting it. Thank goodness for internet! The wealth of information on caring for newborn kittens is massive and I learned many things I didn't know about caring for them.

I was a little worried as I haven't had a pet in many, many years and those were all big enough to eat regular dry food and not need to be cleaned much. These little ones require many feedings from a tiny kitten bottle and some washing...some of it in unpleasant areas....yeah...fun.

Thankfully it turns out it isn't too hard to do. They need to be fed, pet, washed to encourage them to tinkle, and burped...what? Burped? I wasn't sure I read that right but I realized that the mother doesn't have to do that because they feed directly from her, but I guess with a bottle it is like a bottle fed baby, they can swallow lots of air! So, as I snuggle the sweet little kitten in the palm of my hand I pat its little back to burp it. A little strange but it is actually quite rewarding to see these tiny little kittens plumping up and thriving.

Time will tell if they will make it, I am hopeful they will as they have lived with us caring for them for many days now. The first two we tried to save didn't make it and I think a lot of that was due to lack of knowledge as to how to care for little kittens. I think the Lord must have had a hand in this, DH said we couldn't raise all four...He wanted to raise just one, I said let's keep two so each of the kids can have one! He wasn't into that but either way, what to do with the others? We didn't know, didn't have the heart to just "get rid of them" :(

So, we weren't sure, but two of them were gone in the morning. Don't know where they went, maybe the mama decided she could raise those two after all and came back for them, but we watched and watched and she never came back for the two that were left. So, we were given two little kittens by default, two pets, just what I hoped for!

So, a new skill learned, newborn kitten care. And when the kittens eyes open my kids will have two tumbling little kittens they can play with. :)

Update, one of the kittens opened it's eyes today! Looks like they are going to make it. As I picked them up to feed them I can definitely tell they are gaining weight and getting bigger.

The Modest Mom

2010-08-09T07:06:00.000-07:00

As you can see I added a new link to the right to the Modest Mom blog. I have really enjoyed this blog very much over the past month or two since discovering it.

When I learned as an adult about the importance of modesty it was always special to find others who felt the same way and had the same desires to dress modestly all the time.

It was a great joy when I found that there were actually places to buy truly modest swimwear! And right now The Modest Mom is giving away a free swimsuit! Here is a link that will take you directly to the directions on how to win this great swimsuit. http://www.themodestmomblog.com/2010/08/review-and-giveaway-modestly-yours.html

They also sell some great skirts, tops, and nursing covers.

When a bad day happens, and it will.

2010-08-06T17:49:00.000-07:00

Oh, the number of times I have woken up or maybe gotten halfway through a day that started great and then there is the umpteenth accident from the potty trainee, or the 5th time I have had to clean up the same mess the very same day, I keep stubbing my toe, both children are throwing a fit about everything and seem to keep wanting the same toy at the same time.......I'm sure you have been there.

It isn't always fun. Raising children isn't all "I love you mommy's" and hugs and kisses with a sparkling kitchen in the background.

Sometimes I just feel like I am losing my mind. But, when this happens I have slowly but surely come to realize: It isn't that bad. Life is good, life is sweet and every mess I clean I am thankful that I have two hands to clean it and eyes to see when my child is in trouble with something and needs my helping hand and can watch them sleep peacefully each in their own warm bed at night....safe and sound.

It isn't always easy to feel so grateful, to always believe deep down that life in all it's glory and chaos is a beautiful gift. But it is.

Now, I'm not saying I keep a great attitude daily and that I am all laughs and giggles all the time, no way. This is real life we are talking about after all. But, practice makes perfect and even when I don't "feel like it" I try to practice a thankful heart. "For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he" Proverbs 23:7

I have lived through the worst of it, we have lost a child, she is in heaven. Believe me, it can get worse than spilled milk and potty training accidents along side some burnt supper and a late from work husband. It can get much, much worse.

So, when the chips are down....on the floor I just swept....and the kitchen gets too hot to handle in the heat of summer I just remember that I have my children, my husband, my health and most importantly my salvation and the comfort of a loving God to see me through the darkest of times and I smile (even if I still don't feel like it), and sing a little song of praise in my heart to help get my bad attitude back in check.
"...but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience; And patience, experience; and experience, hope: And hope maketh not ashamed..." Romans 5:3-5

So let us practice good thoughts together, remembering to "whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things" Philippians 4:8

Learning to keep house.

2010-08-05T15:55:00.000-07:00

When I was a young girl of 5 to 12 my mother and I spent a ton of time together cleaning. I'm sure we did before then but my memory of age five is probably more dependable! I remember little things here and there from age 3 or so but it is kinda fuzzy.

I always had my little job to do while my mother did the big stuff. Before she started working I spent every day with her at home always enjoying the midday grilled cheese while watching the news then it was back to work we went. I don't remember naps, I must have blocked them out! :)

My mother kept a clean house, VERY clean. The dishes were always done right after dinner and we were the dishwashers. When she cleaned the bathroom or dusted her furniture she would remove every little thing and hand it to me to clean with Windex, then when she was done I got to help her put it all back up on the shelf where it went. I fondly remember jumping under her freshly washed sheet as it floated gently to the bed. This was normal day to day life for me and I thought it was great fun! I don't think I would have thought so if she hadn't done all this with me and enjoyed it herself. When I got bigger she let me try my hand at cleaning the sink all by myself! What a coming of age!:D

So, after that it was quite often when I would get asked to clean the bathroom all by myself, we still did it together some but I began to learn that my mother's duties were much farther reaching than doing dishes and cleaning bathroom sinks. I don't think I ever fully appreciated what it was to be totally responsible for a household 7 days a week all by myself, not until I married and even moreso when I had babies to care for on top of it.

By the time I grew into a young lady I had learned how to iron a shirt, do the laundry, mop, floors, do spring cleaning jobs on a regular basis so nothing ever got out of hand terribly; we never had to actually do a big spring cleaning all at once. She taught me everything I know when it comes to how to clean and keep a meal on the table and clean clothes on our backs.

I will admit, I learned a lot of new tricks and natural cleaning ideas long after I became married, but my mother gave me my start; my foundation and a strong one at that. I knew what it was to serve others at the dinner table and do the little things no one notices like keep stickerburs out of the carpet (well, I guess they notice if I miss one!). As far as cleaning goes organizing was one of the greatest things she taught me as well as speed but more than that even, it was a love of cleaning. The JOY of caring for my family and doing it well. Working hard and working effectively and being content with it.

By the time I was 15 years old; I could clean the entire house for mom and dad while they were at work and knew how to get a meal on the table all the while having the laundry going and still time to sit and read. (I must say I loved Dad's wrinkle free shirts and pants! I miss those! My DH's shirts require ironing! Yikes.)

Things are a little different now with two toddlers running my home, taking out toys all hours of the day and learning to use the potty and trying to figure out daddy's playstation when I turn away to wash a dish. But after they are sleeping or when they are busy playing quietly I know how to get it done and get it done fast all thanks to the training given to me by my mom. Thanks mom.

Besides training me as a youngster my mother still comes over to help me clean and still getting to clean side by side with my mom is a true blessing. And she was right when she said to me (when I was being stubborn not wanting to help with the dishes...teenagers....) "When we do it together it goes fast and it is more fun!"

As mother's I think we have a wonderful opportunity to effect how our own daughters will keep house. Not just by teaching them how to do it but by teaching them that it is normal every day life and normal everyday life and even chores can be done with JOY if done in the spirit of serving our family and our Lord.